usmcsis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- no common sense needed stupid retail stories - part 1 i have a new girl working in my department. for those of you who don't know, i'm the team lead in the food service department of my store. so, yeah, this girl, who will from here on out be called girl, (original i know) is new and due to her scheduling issues, she didn't get a lot of training. so, girl closed the store the other night and i had to open the following morning. so i'm opening the store and putting away the dishes from the night before when i come across the pan that we use in our flashbake oven. (so named because it cooks rilly rilly fast at a rilly rilly high temperature) the pan was completely covered with melted plastic. and i do mean completely. it was friggin dripping off the sides! the first thing i did was cuss a blue streak. then i went to see if she had left me a note telling what in the bejeezus she had done to my pan. no note. so i cussed some more. and then i set it aside, out of my sight, so that i wouldn't be tempted to bludgeon anyone with it. so girl was off that day, but, she was scheduled to work the next day. so, when she got in that day i called her into the backroom. me: um, do you by any chance know what happened to the pan the other night when you worked? (holding jacked up friggin pan for her to see) girl: oh, yeah. i did that. me: (thinking no shit you twit) well, i figured that. (speaking slowly and clearly to lessen her confusion) how did you do this? girl: oh, i was cooking a pizza and i was reading the recipe in the book and it said to use foil and i didn't know what you meant by foil. me: i'm sorry, what? girl: i don't know what foil is. me: foil, F-O-I-L, as in aluminium foil, tin foil. FOIL! girl: oohhhhh! you meant foil. me: (thinking, am i speaking another friggin language here?) yeah, foil. (nods for emphasis) so, what is with the melted plastic? girl: well, since i didn't know what you meant by foil, i looked around in the backroom and i found these soup liners and the box said they could take up to 400 degrees so i put one of them on the pan. but it melted. me: yes, it did. (at this point i am kind of in shock that she is really this, um, not bright) girl: so our oven must be really hot then huh? (i swear to god i am not making this up she actually said that!) me: well, have you ever cooked a frozen pizza at home? (she nods) and you have to cook it at like, 350 or 400 degrees right? (she looks confused but nods anyway) but it has to cook for like half an hour or so. (blank stare here) but we cook a frozen pizza in two minutes. (another nod, but a slow one) so, our oven has to heat up a whole whole lot. way more than 400 degrees. by now i am talking like i would to someone who is practically deaf and reads lips, very very slowly, making sure that i am properly enunciating every single syllable so that she can process the information. and girl is just staring at me with her mouth hanging open and her eyes all wide like i've given her more information that she can handle at one time. girl: so, should i not use those in the oven anymore? i swear, it took every single ounce of self control i have ever had not to hit her in the head with the fucking pan. i love my job. and just a little ps here, i threw the pan in the trash as she stood next to me. i told her it was ruined and i was throwing it away. she held the lid of the trash can for me while i did it. two days later, i was off and one of the other team leads was at food helping girl out and she couldn't find the pan. team lead: girl, do you know where the pan is? girl: you know, i don't know what she did with it. she had it the other day. toodles 11:04 pm - 17 Sep 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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