usmcsis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- venting my spleen came home early from work today with a bad migraine. ha. i say bad migraine like there is such a thing as a good one, or even a not-quite-so-bad migraine. anyway, so i came home early, hung a blanket over my curtain rod, turned the fan on high, got the ice pack out of the freezer for my forehead and went to bed. that was 1:30 this afternoon. now i'm awake. in pain. and with a horrible metallic taste in my mouth. i'm hungry but the mere thought of food makes my stomach turn. i hate feeling like i have to throw up. i hate throwing up. i know that if i do throw up, i'll start feeling better within a few hours. i told my friend marinda this today and she laughed, "a few hours." when i told her a few hours was better than having a migraine that could last a week she stopped laughing. you can always tell when you've met someone whose never had a migraine. it's the weather. it muct be. it's been so humid and there have been so many storms, so much pressure in the air. that's the only thing that makes sense. i haven't done anything different with my diet other than cut back on the mt dew and that causes a withdrawl headache, not a migraine. the pain is totally different, not to mention that i've been through my caffeine withdrawls. i had those weeks ago so that couldn't be my issue this past week. so anyway, it's got to be the weather. my ear has been hurting and i tend to get ear infections during this kind of weather as well. so yeah, i was having a good day at work today. other than the pain, which actually started sunday. i got all of my sandwiches and salads made, i was running kind of busy but still able to keep on top of the workload. i finally got the brew baskets apart and cleaned which i've been asked aubrey to do for two weeks now. tamara and i were actually not killing each other with tension. all in all, migraine aside, not a bad day. but i know tamara was pissed when welton told her i was leaving work early. but that's something i'll have to deal with another day. i really need to find some way to be able to work with her and end all the tension. i've been dreading it but i guess i'm going to have to sit down with her and just flat out ask her what her problem with me is. if there is something that she thinks i should be doing that i'm not or if there's something i shouldn't be doing that i am or whatever i want to get it laid out on the table and work over it. i just can't deal with the tension every day we work together. luckily we only work together two days a week or i'd be out of my mind by this point. she never even congratulated me on my promotion. she's the only person who didn't. when everyone else clapped for me at huddle, she just kind of stood there and half-heartedly put her hands together once. i think she's pissed because she isn't my boss anymore. now we're equals, on the same level. but if she would give me a chance she would know i don't consider us to be equals. i mean, we are equals, we are both level 3 supervisors. but she's been there for years longer than me. she knows how to do tons of stuff that i don't know how to do. i don't even know how to use the cash registers for crying out loud. there is so much that she could teach me, that i want to learn from her. she is a good supervisor and i would love to learn some of her leadership skills. i want to be able to explain some of those things to her but i don't want it to sound like i'm kissing her ass. i don't want her to think that i'm insincere. i want her to know that i mean what i say, that i really do want to learn from her experience and that i want her help in making myself better at my job. i guess i'm just going to have to suck it up, have the gs call her into the office and sit down with her. i'm just nervous that i'll do something stupid like burst into tears for no reason and she won't take me seriously. i need to rehearse what i want to say. and schedule the meeting right after a cigarette break so i'm nice and relaxed. lol i was just reading back over this entry and most of it will make sense to no one but me. lol but as usual i can think better sometimes when i got my thoughts out of my head and in front of my eyes. so now i feel better about going to work tomorrow and sitting down with tamara and getting some things straight. so toodles. 7:33 pm - 14 Jul 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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