usmcsis's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- monday visitation is this evening from six to eight. we have a lot to do today to get ready for tonight. my cousin is on the way to pick me up so that we can get started on our to-do list for today. i just wanted to check in and let everyone know i'm okay. i'm putting off the inevitable though. missy and i both have not dealt with it yet. we've been fighting to keep control of ourselves in the past couple of days. being in her house has been hard on us but at the same time it's been a comfort. a lot of her neighbors have stopped by to give their condolences and to ask about the arrangements and stuff. missy and i have a hard time talking to them because they are crying and they seem to be in need of comfort and we don't know how to comfort them. we stand there and stare at the ground and blink and blink and blink to keep the tears from coming because we will not let ourselves cry. not yet. we will. but we are both kind of practical in that we know that we can't get anything done for grandma or our parents if we break down. so we're holding it in for just a little bit longer, just until we get everything done. tonight will be hard. hell, going to see her this afternoon will be hard. but this afternoon, missy and i can say, well, this is another thing on the to-do list and we have a hundred more so lets get a move on. i know i need to deal with it, we both know that. we're just waiting for the right time. i'm going to be late now, i hadn't planned to sit done and write all of this. have a nice monday everyone and thank you all for the notes and emails. i love you guys! toodles 8:16 am - 29 Nov 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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